What she thinks and says...

Some of you may wonder what Abby thinks about all this. So I thought I would give you a little insight into that.

We told her back at ACH that she had a boo boo inside her head that she can't see and that doesn't hurt but makes her dizzy sometimes and that is why she takes medicine and why she has MRIs. She doesn't call them MRIs-she says they are taking her picture. We explained that the MRI machine is like a huge camera that takes pictures of the inside of her head and lets the doctors look at her boo boo. Honestly, she doesn't ask many questions about it. When she had surgery we told her that they would look inside her head and try to fix some of the boo boo. We answer any questions honestly but like I said, she doesn't ask toom nay questions. She does, however, talk about it a lot.

I thought I would list some of the things she has said:

"I like it when they take my picture. They give me medicine and I fall asleep and I snore and you give me a kiss."

"When they took my brain out it gave me a bubble head" (bubble head is what we called the swelling)

"I couldn't see out of this eye after they took my brain out" (b/c of swelling)

"Did I almost fall and you caught me?" (her version of one of her seizures, she has heard me tell it to doctors and nurses probably 30 times)

She also talks about God, Jesus, and angels a lot.
"When I had surgery, God sent angels to take care of me. I wasn't scared."

"God is talking to me. I think I'll read God a book." (thunder is God talking to her)

"Did God tell you to stay home and take care of your babies b/c I was in the hospital for so long?" (why I don't work any more)

"Angels carry you to heaven, mama"

"I love Jesus. I want him to come play toys with me."

"The Holy Ghost is a good ghost." (has been talking about ghosts a lot lately so we had a talk about the Holy Ghost and now that is what she always wants to talk about, the Holy Ghost!)

It always amazes me the simple love she has for God and Jesus. She sees them as real people who care about her. I am so glad that she understands that so young.

I love listening to her talk b/c I never know what kind of precious words will come out of that mouth. If I think of any more I will post them.

Please continue to lift her and our family up in prayer.

St. Jude Memphis Marathon Weekend

Join the Abby's Army marathon team! On December 5th, there will be the annual St. Jude Memphis Marathon with proceeds going to St. Jude Children's Hospital, where Abby receives treatment. There is a full marathon, half marathon, and a 5k run/walk. My stepsister, Tanya, and her husband, Brian, have formed the team and are trying to raise $2000 in Abby's name. You can register to run/walk or make a donation.

This is the link to the team page where you can make donations.
www.mystjudeheroes.org/abbysarmy

If you want to run/walk in Abby's name, go to http://www.stjudemarathon.org/ and register. Be sure to join team Abby's Army (under St. Jude Heroes).

Thank you Brian and Tanya! I can't wait to see how much you are able to raise!

How is Abby?

I get asked that question alot when I am out and about. I usually say "Wonderful!" which is true but I thought I would provide a more detailed answer here.

Abby IS doing wonderful. If you were to watch her play or talk you would never know what she had been through. The only "marks" are the two scars on her head, one of which you can't see unless you look for it. The other is more obvious b/c they shaved so much of her hair but I am sure that strangers think she got the scissors out and cut her own hair! I watch her play and sing and dance and feel that it is truly a miracle! The tumor is still there and will always be there but we feel so blessed that she is so normal right now and that there are no real side effects from the tumor or the surgery.

Usually what I leave unspoken is that her future remains unclear. All is great right now but we have no guarantee that it will stay that way. Chemo and radiation are more than likely in her future. The tumor is still very large and if it grows it could cause impairments. I know my God is bigger than all this and that if He says so it will never grow again-we are just not sure that is His plan for her.

Although God has blessed us abundantly, I still have days that I just don't understand all that has happened and when I have so many questions and not enough answers. I also worry about what the future holds for us. We truly do not know. I lay in bed and wonder if she will have to start chemo soon, if she will live a long life, and when and if the tumor does grow what side effects there will be. I trust that God will provide for us and will take care of her no matter what happens in the future-but the worry and fear is always there. When I feel overwhelmed by it (which happens often) I pray that God will help me through it and will replace that worry and fear with joy and thankfulness for this day, another day I have to hold her and talk to her and play with her. And you know what? God always comes through for me-the fear melts and the worry subsides. And I remember all He has done, that He is in control, and that He loves me and her. How lucky we are to have someone like that to go to in times of darkness!

Thank you all for your prayers and please continue to lift Abby's name up in prayer!

"Be still and know that I am God..." Psalm 46:10